I got another piece of lovely mail from the EDD sometime last week. I’ve already forgotten what day it arrived. I can say with certainty that it arrived within two weeks of when I applied for Unemployment Insurance.
In all caps, near the top of the letter, it says:
“TELEPHONE INTERVIEW NOTIFICATION AND INSTRUCTIONS”
(Insert ominous sounding music from a horror movie here.)
It goes on to say that a telephone interview has been scheduled for me, and exactly what date and time that has been assigned. It is clear from all the ink they used to make so many of the words on this letter in bold print that this is serious business! My official telephone interview will take place on October 28, 2009.
It is a big deal to them if I “cannot keep this appointment”. It tells me how to go about rescheduling it if I need to. Honestly, though… what the hell else do I have to do? I’m unemployed! If I don’t appear for this phone interview, the EDD will make “a decision” for me “based on available information”. In bold, again, this letter tells me that not doing this interview when it is scheduled “may result in a denial of benefits”.
I’ve yet to see any benefits. I was not getting money from the EDD when this letter arrived, and I still haven’t received any as I type this blog. From what I can tell from the last batch of mail they sent me, I will not even be able to send in the special paper that gets me “benefits” until October 11. (More about that in a future blog post!). When does that money arrive? I’ve no idea. I feel like I’m being warned about just how quickly and easily the financial assistance I can potentially get from the EDD can be yanked away from me, before I even see one red cent of it. I can feel myself starting to get angry and frustrated already, and I haven’t finished reading the letter yet!
It seems that part of being on Unemployment Insurance involves a mandatory telephone interview. I learn something new (and terrifically stressful) about being unemployed nearly every day.
Why do they want to do a telephone interview with me? There is a note at the bottom of this letter that instructs me to turn it over, for further instructions. I’m supposed to read all this over before the interview, so I will have “all pertinent information available before the interview”. Great.
*flip!*
In bold, (they do like the bold font at the EDD), the first thing it says on the back of this letter is “TELEPHONE INTERVIEW INSTRUCTIONS”. Yes, it actually is in all caps, once again. (They also really like pressing the Caps Lock key at the EDD). Nearly every word on this letter is super, super important!
The back of the letter says I “may be asked some of the following questions” at the telephone interview.
* The reason why you left your job at (the school I used to work for)
That’s an easy one. “Well, you see, I got this letter in the mail telling me I no longer had a job….”
* Why are you no longer working at your very last job
“Well, you see, I got this letter in the mail telling me I no longer had a job….”
* Were you warned that your actions could result in being fired?
“Hell, no!”
* When were you warned?
“Ummmm… let’s see… that would be… never!”
* If you were fired because your employer said you could not do the job, what kind of work were you doing?
The smart ass in me wants to answer this with ” What kind of work? Well, I must have been doing piss-poor work, sir.” The adult in me knows that is NOT the answer to go with!
Is this the part where I tell the EDD that my employer said I didn’t have a “specific skill set”, even though I never got a clear answer what that “specific skill set” was? Or do I tell them that I “failed to complete my probationary period”, as the letter that took away my job states? How, exactly, do I explain that from what I can tell, the only part I did not complete was the six month review that the employer neglected to give me? Is this a trick question? Right now, I’m hoping they just decide not to ask me that one.
* How long did you have this job?
That’s easy. I started in January of this year, and… stopped? at the end of September of this year. Nine months. Long enough to have a baby.
* Had you ever done this kind of work before?
Was I ever “a paraeducator for Special Education” before? No, I’ve never held that exact job title before. But, I did spend four years as a Substitute teacher in public schools in Illinois, working with a great variety of students. I even had a long term sub assignment taking over for a teacher’s aide in a Special Education classroom. That lasted about.. three months, maybe, while the woman I was replacing was on pregnancy leave. And, I’ve had a bunch of days where I was the Sub for Special Education teachers, so they could do meetings, or have work time to fill out the endless paperwork Special Education teachers have to fill out. Does any of that count? I’m not sure.
These questions are surprisingly familiar. I’m fairly certain they are the same questions I had to answer when I applied online for Unemployment Insurance in the first place. I guess the EDD needs these answered in text, add voice format, for some reason.
Since I lost my job, the Pessimist in me has been feeding on all of this, and growing larger and larger by the day. It has risen up, strangled the teeny, tiny Optimist that used to live inside me, and murdered it.
The Pessimist in me is screaming out a warning: “This is all a trick!”, it screams. “The government doesn’t have enough money to help you, so it’s trying to find a way to deny your benefits! They don’t want to help you!”
Is the Pessimist correct? I’m inclined to believe that it might very well be. I’ve had a… less than positive, shall we say,… experience involving benefits from the government not too many years ago. (This involved Disability benefits Shawn was supposed to receive). Also, because of the way I was informed that I no longer had a job, I’m having a very difficult time right now trusting that people who hold any kind of power of my fate will actually help me, if they have the choice between “helping me” and saying “No help for you (insert evil laugh here)!”
It’s going to be a long, long, couple of weeks until this telephone interview happens. So far, being on Unemployment Insurance has given me several headaches, and exactly zero financial assistance. I hate this.
Tags: Unemployment Insurance
I forgot to tell you that I gave Bob your number and asked him to call me there.
We were going to go drinking that afternoon. No matter, because a bunch of 53-year-old learning handicapped students escaped from his institution around lunchtime, and he had to go hunt them down like dogs.
Honestly, I don’t know why you would want another job in that business.
Sorry about the miscommunication!
Sounds like Bob will be busy for a while.
I’ll keep an eye out for a pack of unattended 53 year old learning handicapped students, roaming the neighborhood.